5 ways to write a post titled 'X ways to do...'

You have seen and read these posts all along. They have a title that says something similar to '5 ways to to climb Mount Everest' and you think to yourself, 'Hey! Now thats something I have always wanted to do!' Yeah right. The minute you see a number in the beginning of the title you just have to read it. Every time you finish reading such an article you take an oath never to fall prey to such stupid marketing techniques ever again. And the very next day you are reading 6 Terrifying Ways Crows Are Way Smarter Than You Think. Do not despair, for I am part of the very same crowd. And today, I am going to describe 5 ways to write such an article.

1. The value that X takes in 'X ways to do...' is of utmost importance. Statisticians have spent copious amounts of NSF funds trying to find that elusive sweet spot which would send the most number of morons on the internet to your site. The most common ones use 5 or 10 - a nice whole number which everyone knows about. 5 fingers on each hand. Counting to ten, anyone? Then there are those who choose numbers related to time periods - 7 (days), 24(hours), 30(days in a month), 365(days in a year) and so on. And finally there are those who truly stand out by using prime numbers! 
2. What do you write about? The crux of the matter at hand. Technology, politics, love, movies, sports - it could be any of the mundane things on this planet. Maybe you had that epic nirvana moment when you felt you fully understood something? You could talk about that. Exactly what I am doing right now
3. Pick a verb. It has to be one. 'X ways to...' could be followed by do, have, kick, kiss, spoof, run, anything you want - as long as it is a verb.
4. Do some background research. Has someone already blogged about your chosen topic? How best can you put that person down? Go for it!
5. If you are reading this last step, you are one of the chosen few who will live be interested to witness Dagor Dagorath. The last 'way' in any such article is filled with so much BS even the author gets repulsed when he/she rereads it. 

The above ways are intended to launch a new wave of 'Y ways to write a post titled 'X ways to do...'' articles. The day the internet ends will be the day bloggers hit a recursion stack overflow error. And that day is Dagor Dagorath.

Cheers.